I don’t think so.
I have an almost pathological hatred of rugby league, or as I call, it “thugby”leage. Some of this comes from childhood, and the arguments and silent, cold fronts with mother. She liked to go to watch the local rugby league games at Eskdale Park on a Sunday. I could think of nothing worse.
Attendance at these regional games in the 1970s and 1980s was from a small wooden grandstand, riddled with splinters, or from the back of a car, perched in the boot or in the back of a ute. Irregular shouts to mates, sons, brothers or fathers on the field, to the mixed shouts of joyous victory or loud objection when a try was scored or converted. No rhyme, no rhythm. Imagine, for an undiagnosed autistic girl, forced into this mix, To me, that the bookish, undiagnosed autistic girl, barbarous and without reason, wa san unjustifiable assault on my senses.
Many of my blog posts are triggered by something in the news, a conversation, something topical. If you follow the NRL (National Rugby League), you may know that Round 1 of the 2025 season was held in Las Vegas. You may also have heard Peter V’landy’s invitation to President Trump to attend this opening round of the 2025 season.
In this invitation, V’landy’s proclaimed that rugby league as the toughest game on Earth, the most brutal. Now, with my antipathy towards rugby league, and my autistic sense of justice, I “arced up”. Because I read, a lot, I knew of some other tough, brutal games that I think would be rugby league to shame. So, I had a chat with ChatGPT and asked for a blog post.
Now, something you may not know about ChatGPT is that you can moderate the tone of its response, by giving it the instruction to “write this to 0.1″”, where 0.1 is conservative and 0.9 is absurd. With mischievous intent, I asked ChatGPT to write me that blog post, challenging the notion that rugby league is the toughest, most brutal game on Earth. First, I asked for a 0.7 response. Then I asked it for a 0.1 response. And finally, I asked it for a 0.9 response. I lay these out here, for your consumption, and a firm takedown of rugby league as the toughest, most brutal game on the planet.
As always, you are welcome to view the full transcript of the chat with ChatGPT here.
The 0.1 response
Tough as Leather: A Measured Examination of Rugby League’s Claim to Be the Toughest Sport on Earth
The National Rugby League (NRL) promotes rugby league as the toughest sport on the planet. It’s an impressive claim, one that deserves careful scrutiny. What does “tough” truly mean?
Tough (adj.):
- Able to withstand hardship, strain, or difficulty.
- Resilient, durable, and unyielding.
- As tough as leather—strong, but with variations in thickness and flexibility depending on how it has been treated.
With this definition in mind, we must assess whether rugby league stands alone as the world’s toughest sport or whether other contenders surpass it in physical and mental demands.
Comparing Rugby League to Other Demanding Sports
1. Jai Alai: The Fastest Ball Sport on Earth
Jai alai involves players using curved baskets (cestas) to launch a hard rubber ball (pelota) at speeds exceeding 300 km/h. The walls of the court create unpredictable ricochets, and missed calculations can result in serious injuries. The pelota has been described as having the density of a pool cue ball, meaning any direct impact can cause fractures or concussions.
Rugby league requires endurance and contact resilience, but it does not subject players to the risk of a high-speed projectile breaking bones mid-game.
Edge: Jai Alai
2. Kabaddi: Strength, Strategy, and Oxygen Deprivation
Kabaddi is a team sport in which a “raider” must cross into the opposing team’s half, tag defenders, and return—all while holding their breath. Defenders attempt to stop the raider using grappling techniques, often leading to intense physical struggles. Success depends on strength, agility, and the ability to control oxygen intake under pressure.
Rugby league involves sprinting, tackling, and endurance, but players do not have to engage in controlled asphyxiation as part of their strategy.
Edge: Kabaddi
3. Buzkashi: Rugby on Horseback with a Dead Goat
Buzkashi is a traditional Central Asian sport in which mounted players compete to gain control of a headless goat carcass and carry it to a goal. The game is often played with minimal rules, and riders frequently collide, fall, or engage in physical confrontations. Injuries range from broken bones to trampling.
Rugby league is a high-contact sport, but it does not involve horseback collisions or the additional hazards of an uncontrolled playing surface.
Edge: Buzkashi
4. Calcio Storico: A Hybrid of Football and Bare-Knuckle Fighting
Calcio storico, played in Florence, combines football, wrestling, and unregulated physical combat. Players attempt to score by throwing a ball into a goal, but they can punch, kick, and tackle opponents without penalty. The result is a game that often leaves participants with broken noses, fractured ribs, and other serious injuries.
Rugby league has a strong tackling component and occasional fights, but it remains structured within a formal rule set that limits open combat.
Edge: Calcio Storico
5. Inuit Knuckle Hop: A Pure Test of Pain Endurance
Inuit knuckle hop is a competition where participants move forward across a hard surface using only their fists and toes. The goal is to continue for as long as possible, enduring extreme pain and potential nerve damage.
Rugby league players frequently play through injuries, but the sport does not include a dedicated element of self-inflicted pain as a competitive measure.
Edge: Knuckle Hop
Conclusion: How Tough is Rugby League?
Rugby league is undoubtedly a physically demanding sport. It requires endurance, strength, resilience, and the ability to withstand repeated impacts. Players often continue playing despite injuries, and the sport fosters a strong culture of toughness.
However, when compared to other extreme sports that involve higher risks of serious injury, death, or extreme pain endurance, rugby league does not singularly stand as the toughest sport on earth. It is one of the toughest, but there are several sports that present even greater physical and mental challenges.
The claim that rugby league is the toughest sport is, therefore, subjective—true within its own context but not when measured against the full spectrum of physically extreme global sports.
The 0.7 response
Tough as Leather: A Deeply Serious Analysis of Rugby League’s Claim to Be the Toughest Sport on Earth
The National Rugby League (NRL) boldly claims that rugby league is the toughest game on the planet. It’s a grand assertion, one that invites scrutiny, much like a drunken prop forward charging into a defensive line of well-rested opposition. But before we entertain such a lofty claim, let us first define “tough.”
Tough (adj.):
- Strong enough to withstand adverse conditions or rough handling.
- Demonstrating a capacity for endurance, hardship, or pain.
- Resilient, unyielding, and—most critically—as tough as leather.
Now, leather is an interesting benchmark for toughness. It is durable, yes. It can take a beating, certainly. It is used in everything from footballs to whips to ancient forms of body armour. But the degree of toughness depends on the leather. Is rugby league full-grain leather, thick and weathered, ready to saddle a cowboy? Or is it a delicate designer handbag, expensive but easily scuffed if someone so much as sneezes on it?
The Leather-Tough Gauntlet: Rugby League vs. the Rest of the World
Let’s examine whether rugby league deserves this “toughest sport” title when put up against some of the most brutal, skin-flaying, organ-rearranging pastimes in the world.
1. Jai Alai: The Sport of Death and High-Speed Projectiles
Jai alai is an innocent-looking game if you’re legally blind. Players wield curved baskets called cestas to hurl a rock-hard ball at speeds exceeding 300 km/h. The court is essentially a giant ricochet chamber, where one misstep results in a ball to the face with the impact force of a car crash. Concussions are not just common; they are a baseline expectation.
Rugby league is indeed rough, but players generally do not die mid-match from a game-related object fracturing their skull at Formula One speeds.
Advantage: Jai Alai
2. Kabaddi: Full-Contact Breath-Holding Combat
Kabaddi is rugby league’s feral cousin, but with an added level of oxygen deprivation that makes it as much a test of lung capacity as of brute strength. Imagine a game where a player must invade enemy territory, wrestle multiple defenders to the ground, and then escape—all while holding their breath. In essence, it’s an asthma attack combined with a pub brawl.
While rugby league does feature big hits and endurance, players can at least breathe while tackling.
Advantage: Kabaddi
3. Buzkashi: Rugby, but on Horses, with a Dead Goat
Rugby league players fancy themselves tough for surviving head-high tackles and being driven into the turf by men built like refrigerators. That’s cute. In buzkashi, Central Asian warriors ride galloping horses while battling over a headless goat carcass, using their fists, whips, and sheer force of will outmanoeuvre each other. Limbs are broken. Players are trampled. The only rule seems to be, “Survive.”
Rugby league is many things, but it lacks the medieval battlefield aesthetic of buzkashi.
Advantage: Buzkashi
4. Calcio Storico: Florence’s Renaissance Thunderdome
The Italians—known for their artistry, cuisine, and Renaissance achievements—also invented calcio storico, a game where 27 men per team engage in a lawless hybrid of football, wrestling, and outright street fighting. The goal is to get a ball into a net, but since there are no substitutions and no limits on full-force punches, kicks, and chokeholds, the game frequently looks like an MMA brawl staged inside a soccer field.
Compared to calcio storico, rugby league might as well be a gentleman’s afternoon of croquet.
Advantage: Calcio Storico
5. Inuit Knuckle Hop: The Pain Olympics
The knuckle hop is a sport in which competitors drop to their hands and toes and attempt to move forward across hard surfaces—ice, gym floors, whatever’s available—on their knuckles. The aim? Endure pain longer than the other competitors. This is not a team sport; it is an existential test of whether you truly deserve to remain conscious.
NRL players are known to complain about bruised ribs and corked thighs. Inuit knuckle hop participants scoff in the face of nerve damage.
Advantage: Knuckle Hop
The Verdict: Is Rugby League Actually the Toughest Sport?
If rugby league is “tough as leather”, then these other sports are tough as the rawhide used to make boots for gladiators. Yes, rugby league is a brutal game. Players collide like meteorites, their ears end up looking like scrunched-up receipts, and they routinely soldier on through injuries that would send most people into early retirement. But does it hold the global title for sheer, unrelenting toughness?
No.
Not when there are sports where people get knocked unconscious by high-speed balls, endure prolonged asphyxiation, risk horse trampling, participate in sanctioned brawls, or deliberately flay their own knuckles against frozen landscapes.
So, dear NRL, we appreciate your bravado. But if you want to claim the title of the toughest sport on Earth, you might need to add a few dead goats, some high-speed projectiles, and a no-holds-barred street fight to the mix. Otherwise, let’s just agree that you’re pretty tough—but not quite goat-trampling, oxygen-deprived, face-shattering tough.
And the 0.9 response (I nearly came undone laughing)
Tough as Leather and Twice as Dumb: The Great Rugby League Delusion
The National Rugby League (NRL) proudly proclaims that rugby league is the toughest sport on the planet. A bold claim. A grand claim. A claim so absurd that it deserves to be examined under a microscope, dissected with surgical precision, and then launched into the sun for the sheer audacity of its delusion.
But before we obliterate this claim with the force of a front-rower colliding with an unmarked goalpost, let’s define our key term.
What Does “Tough” Even Mean?
Tough (adj.):
- Physically resilient—able to take repeated impacts without shattering into a million pieces.
- Mentally unyielding—able to withstand hardship, pain, and existential horror.
- As tough as leather—specifically, the kind of leather used to make medieval war saddles, not the flimsy designer wallet that falls apart when you accidentally leave it in your pocket during a rainstorm.
Now, rugby league players are undeniably tough, in the same way that a brick wall is tough—it absorbs a lot of impact, but eventually, it crumbles, usually in spectacular fashion. They throw themselves into tackles with reckless abandon, bounce off the turf like crash test dummies, and then slap each other on the back as if their spines haven’t just lost two inches in height.
But is rugby league the toughest sport? Let’s take a scenic tour through the world’s actual toughest sports and see how it stacks up.
1. Jai Alai: A Game So Dangerous It Was Literally Outlawed in Some Places
Imagine tennis, but instead of a fuzzy green ball, the players are hurling a rock-hard projectile at 300 km/h. Now, imagine playing that game inside a closed court where the ball bounces unpredictably, ricocheting off walls like a deranged poltergeist. This is jai alai, a sport so unforgiving that players have died from ball impact alone.
By contrast, rugby league players wear mouthguards and get medical stoppages when they tweak a hamstring.
Advantage: Jai Alai
2. Kabaddi: The Full-Contact Sport Where Breathing Is a Luxury
Rugby league requires endurance, but you know what else requires endurance? Holding your breath while being tackled by multiple opponents.
Kabaddi is a sport where players must invade enemy territory, tag an opponent, and escape—all while exhaling in one continuous breath. If they inhale? Instant disqualification. If they fail to escape? Good luck, because they’re about to be buried alive under a pile of extremely motivated human beings.
Rugby league players take a water break every few minutes.
Advantage: Kabaddi
3. Buzkashi: Rugby League, but on Horses, and with a Corpse
Rugby league players think they’re tough because they play in rain, mud, and the occasional heatwave. Meanwhile, buzkashi players are charging across open fields on horseback, engaging in a full-contact brawl to control the carcass of a headless goat.
Think about that for a moment. These men are playing a game where the ball is a decapitated, skinned, 20-kilogram goat corpse, and they must wrestle for control of it while avoiding being trampled by their own teammates.
Meanwhile, rugby league referees call a penalty if someone’s hand slightly brushes another player’s face.
Advantage: Buzkashi
4. Calcio Storico: When You Mix Football with Medieval War
Calcio storico is played in Florence, where 27 men per team take to the field. The goal? Score by throwing a ball into the opponent’s net. The secondary goal? Inflict maximum bodily harm.
The rules allow—nay, encourage—punching, kicking, headbutting, and choking. If you are knocked unconscious? Too bad. No substitutions. No stoppages. Get up or get left behind.
Rugby league players complain about high tackles. Calcio storico players wake up in hospital and call that a successful game.
Advantage: Calcio Storico
5. The Inuit Knuckle Hop: Where Pain Is the Only Measure of Success
The knuckle hop is exactly what it sounds like. Competitors drop to their fists and toes and hop forward until they physically can’t continue due to extreme pain and skin loss.
There are no tries, no goals, no breaks. Just sheer suffering and a competition to see who will break first.
Meanwhile, rugby league players have concussion protocols and rehabilitation periods.
Advantage: Knuckle Hop
Final Verdict: Rugby League Is Not the Toughest Sport on Earth
Is rugby league tough? Yes.
Is it even close to the toughest? Not even slightly.
Toughness is relative. If you spend all your time surrounded by other rugby league players, then yes, you will probably believe that no one has ever endured such punishment. But step outside the NRL’s carefully curated universe, and you’ll find that there are entire sports where death is a standard occupational hazard.
So, while rugby league players may be tough as leather, that leather is softened, polished, and stitched together with sponsorship money. Meanwhile, the competitors in these other sports are chewing on rawhide and using it as dental floss before they ride into battle on horseback, holding a headless goat and praying to their ancestors for strength.
Final Score:
NRL Toughness Rating: 7/10
Global Toughness Benchmark: 15/10 (requires limb loss or death to qualify)
The NRL is free to claim whatever it likes in marketing campaigns, but as far as reality goes? Rugby league is the toughest sport in rugby league. Outside of that? It’s a rough game played by men who would run screaming from a high-speed jai alai pelota to the face.
The Auld Skald's Fudgel 